Thursday, 11 September 2008

What's really going on in the world



After last months forray into the depths of my spam folder, picking my way through the wealth of Paris Hilton abuse and promises of a "longer weapon", it's time to take another sneaky peak and report - exclusively to you, dear (nay, troubled) readers - what's really going on in the world this week.

"Denzil Washington knew which herbal supplement to take" - Good ol' Denzil. I always knew he had good taste in herbal supplements. I'm pleased for him.

"Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson and Paris Hilton unite against homeless people" - And the homeless are quaking in their boots, I'm sure. Unfortunately we'll never know as I opted not to continue reading Rajan Thawley's important email having been distracted by...

"Britney Spears shaves head at request of zombie overlord" - I always suspected this, it just makes perfect sense. Thanks, Rosario Achara.

"Paris Hilton Groundhog Day controversy update" - "Paris Hilton Groundhog Day controversy update" - "Paris Hilton Groundhog Day controversy update" - "Paris Hilton Groundhog Day controversy update" - "Paris Hilton Groundhog Day controversy update" - "Paris Hilton Groundhog Day controversy update" - "Paris Hilton Groundhog Day controversy update" - "Paris Hilton Groundhog Day controversy update"

Do you see what I did there? Genius. But all incredibly funny jokes aside, this is a very serious matter. Poor old Paris stuck in her repetitive little world, scared out of her tiny blonde head. At least she can go running about on a giant piano.

Oh no, hold on, that was Big wasn't it?

"Your love rod is set to set her on fire" - Does anyone have a manual? I should probably change the setting before something terrible happens.

But the reward of Spam Of The Week this week goes to Dimitri Hajric for this little gem: "Paris Hilton excited to have French city named after her"

Good night!

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